Pod People in Yellow and Black

I've told you guys that Summit County's been overrun with Steeler fans. Now, the Beacon-Journal says so too. Kudos to the guy in the article who called these people out for being the pod people that they are.

I think I'll send this story, along with a congratulatory note, to Randy Lerner.

Sick of ESPN's Super Bowl Hype-a-thon?

So are these guys.

Lesbian Cheerleader Pleads Guilty!

Angela Keithley (brunette on the right), former Carolina TopCat, pleaded guilty to disorderly conduct and obstructing a police officer. Victoria Thomas (blonde on the left) faces more serious charges.

Here's the statement witness and Banana Joe's patron, Melissa Holden, provided to the police:

" Defendant Keathley was standing on the toilet and her head was above the stall. Holden further stated that defendant [Thomas’] feet were facing inward toward Keathley’s body. Holden stated that Keathley was making facial expressions and noises that were consistent with that of a person engaged in sexual activity."

Ms. Keithley received a six-month probation.

That's just sad. How could our society be so wrong? This is clearly prosecutorial misconduct. And, if that's the case, in the words of Eric "Otter" Stratton, "isn't this an indictment of the whole United States of America...?" Like Otter, I, for one am not going to sit here while others bad mouth the United States of America...or hot lesbian cheerleaders.

Party On Ben!

In case you missed them, Deadspin.com has a bunch of photos of Big Ben Roethlisberger enjoying life. I've got a few observations here. First, I love the t-shirt. Second, I'd like to think an NFL Super Bowl QB could do better in terms of arm candy -- I mean, Kyle Orton doesn't even start (although at least Ben didn't spill his drink all over his shirt).

Finally, the big question: how did Coach Tressel not recruit this guy?

Chad Greenway

Still pouting over the fact that A.J. Hawk isn't going to be there with the 12th pick? Yeah, me too--although I hear he's got a new haircut that makes him look like a dolphin.

Speaking of bad haircuts, Mel Kiper thinks that the Browns may console themselves with this guy, Chad Greenway of Iowa. That's one hell of a consolation prize. Greenway's 6'4", 250 lbs. and runs a 4.55 forty. The scouting report basically says that he's a stud. Lower body strength and the ability to shed blocks are some of the raps against him, along with a tendency to play in an undisciplined manner. (When did this become a negative for a linebacker?) He also blew out a knee during his freshman year at Iowa and had to have reconstructive surgery, which I'm sure will factor into the Browns' decisionmaking if he's still on the board.

I know that OLB is a critical position in the 3-4, but I think the Browns actually have bigger needs on the offensive and defensive lines. Still, it sure wouldn't break my heart to see them take Greenway with the 12th pick. I wonder if the decision on whether to pick an OLB in the first round might come down to whether the Browns think Bobby Carpenter will be available in the second?

Tressel's World

Vinny's a tough act to follow, so I won't even try. Instead, I'm turning things over to Coach Jim Tressel of the Ohio State Buckeyes. Apparently, the coach has his own blog. As you can see, Tressel's World provides some, ah, unique insights into the life of the man behind the vest.

For example, I'll bet you were dying to know how Coach Tressel celebrated his Fiesta Bowl victory over Notre Dame? Well, wonder no longer. Tressel's blog also touches on the coach's many civic activities, including visits to a children's hospital and assistance to Katrina victims. Also, did you know that Coach Tressel is a die hard Tribe fan? He was as disappointed as the rest of us with the Tribe's October choke-a-thon.

Still no insight as to why the hell Coach Tressel had an extra collar stay for Jack Arute right before kickoff of the Fiesta Bowl, but there are still a lot of interesting tidbits to be found in Tressel's World.

You don't suppose Coach Tressel is using a ghostwriter for this, do you? This has to be one of the funniest parody sites I've ever come across.

This just in...more on the trade

The good people of Baltimore have expressed their delight in the acquisition of Kris Benson.

Stay tuned.

Big Baseball Trade

Did anyone notice that Kris Benson, one of last year's free agent "gems," was recently traded from the Mets to the Orioles? If not, you should investigate it.

Start with his wife, Anna Benson. That's her over there, and there, and there.

She loves herself. Happily, she also makes love to herself fairly often and writes or speaks about it---incessantly. Check out all her wisdom at http://www.annabenson.net Don't miss Anna's Scarlett Letters where sadly she shows her "intelligence" rather than her boobs.

Also, check out "Ask Anna Anything," where she discusses, in her words, her "funbags." Obviously, this was a big acquisition for the Orioles. Stay tuned.

Mathias Kiwanuka

Another guy already showing up in a few mock drafts as a possible Browns' first round pick is Boston College defensive end Mathias Kiwanuka. Kiwanuka is 6'7" but only 260 lbs, which means he could probably put on another 20 lbs without losing any of his quicks, of which he has plenty (4.75 forty). The scouting reports on him say he's a natural pass rusher with a lot of upside, but is not yet a solid run defender and has trouble shedding blocks. Depending on who you listen to, Kiwanuka is either the first or second ranked DE in the draft.

Kiwanuka scares me. He is an incredible physical specimen but has a lot of question marks. I'm afraid that the Browns might want to convert a guy like him to OLB, which would make the pick even more risky.

Interestingly, he's the grandson of Uganda's first prime minister, Benedicto Kiwanuka, who was assassinated by Idi Amin in 1972.

Kelly Shoppach

Kelly Shoppach was a nice piece to the Coco Crisp trade. He'll be a pretty solid big league catcher. But, don't believe the Jason Varitek comparisons that have been thrown around. He's not Varitek and won't be unless he exhibits a big growth spike. Right now he projects to be more like Benjie Molina than Varitek. His projected major league equivalency based upon his minor league performance looks like this: .242 average; .320 on-base; and .419 slugging. He's capable of 18 homers and a similar number of doubles. If you compare him offensively to the other MLB catchers, he'd end up in the top 35%. On the other hand, Victor Martinez would grade out as a top three catcher in anyone's scenario.

But the reason Shopppach's addition to the deal generates a little excitement is that he controls the running game. Last year in AAA, he threw out 44% of the runners who tried to steal against him. Typically, anything over 33% is considered very good. His caught stealing rate will likely go down in the majors, but the bottom line is that, as the cliche goes, he has very good catch and throw skills. When you combine Shoppach's excellent defensive skills with his above average (for the position) hitting, he presents as a good major leaguer.

Blogger and Media Reactions to the Crisp Deal

Cleveland fans are supposedly upset by the Crisp deal. If that's so, none of those fans appear to be on the Internet. Reaction among Tribe bloggers is uniformly favorable. Check these out.

• Mistake by the Lake Sporting Times has an interesting post on the Crisp trade. They love it. Read the comments too.
  

• Let's Go Tribe has posted the first in a series of articles analyzing the trade.
  

• The Cleveland Indians Report hasn't analyzed the actual deal, but based on what they wrote in advance of the deal, they love having Marte in the organization.

Of course, the Red Sox are spinning the deal hard, and if Epstein's as high on it as he sounds, we ought to worry a little, because he's no dummy. Reaction among the Sox fans appears mixed, with some guys going so far as to say that Coco will quickly make fans stop missing Johnny Damon. Others are a little more wary.

The local media has some analysis of the deal, starting with The Beacon-Journal's Terry Pluto, who wrote about the deal in-depth and is generally favorable toward it. In The News-Herald, Jim Ingraham's column focuses on the other prospect included in the deal, catcher Kelly Shoppach. What about The Plain Dealer? While the PD devotes a lot of newsprint to covering the trade itself, aside from a brief Paul Hoynes soundbite about the deal, the only Tribe analysis this morning was contained in Roger Brown's column, where he discussed Casey Blake. Go figure.

Haloti Ngata

Oregon nose tackle Haloti Ngata is getting a lot of buzz as a possible Browns' first round pick. Here's what the Canton Repository's Steve Doerschuk said in his team report on the Browns at The Sporting News.com:

"The Browns are taking a hard look at Oregon T Haloti Ngata. His listed size of 6-3 3/4, 336 pounds could change at the NFL Scouting Combine, but there's no doubt his body type fits Crennel's scheme. Ngata declared for the draft early, but he's not too young, having turned 22 on Jan. 21. As a junior at Orgeon, he learned not to rely only on his incredible strength. He found new ways to get leverage and use his feet to consistently tie up more than one blocker. His knack for blocking kicks speaks to his ability to get an inside push as a pass rusher, an element the Browns sorely lacked in 2005. Ngata would make sense for the Browns at the No. 12 position in Round 1, and early projections suggest he could be there."

I saw this guy play a couple of times this year (against Oregon St. and in the Holiday Bowl), and he can be a terror when he wants to be. If anything, he looks bigger than his listed size. Another thing that I love about this guy is that he was once kicked out of a national championship high school rugby game for unnecessary roughness. Ever see a rugby game? You've got to commit felony assault in order to get tossed out for unnecessary roughness. The Browns could sure use somebody like that to shore up the porous middle of that defensive line.

Here's a profile of Ngata. I don't know enough about him right now to have an opinion of him as a prospect, other than to say that it sounds like he's definitely worth keeping an eye on.

Coco Crisp Trade

The Tribe pulled the trigger on the Coco Crisp deal last night, but only after Boston sweetened it a bit by throwing in more cash and a player to be named later and more cash. Did I mention more cash? Now Larry Dolan can afford to buy the baseballs for Spring Training.

Shapiro's take on all of this is "trust me," and he's certainly earned that much from Tribe fans. With the Sox desperate to replace Damon, Crisp's value may never have been higher. There's a lot of upside potential in this trade, although most of it is long-term. Based on what Shapiro's saying, my guess is that stud 3rd base prospect Andy Marte, whom the trade is all about, isn't likely to make a big impact until 2007. (Sorry gang, it looks like the Aaron Boone and Casey Blake show again at the hot corner this year).

Guillermo Mota could be a nice pick-up if healthy, but the jury's out on whether Jason Michaels is an every day player. The guy certainly put up decent offensive numbers as a part-timer for the Phillies last year. He doesn't have Coco's speed, but you can't steal first, and Michaels' OBP is 60 points higher than Crisp's. However, the rap on him in Philly was that he was better suited to play left or right field, but with Abreu and Burrell on the roster, he was never going to get that chance. If that's right, then maybe he'll be able to come into his own in Cleveland (and if he posts the kind of numbers that Vinny thinks he might, I'll be happy). Unfortunately, there's also evidence to suggest that Michaels is a bit of a knucklehead, as demonstrated by his arrest last season for taking a poke at a Philly cop.

Like Vinny said, it's a shame that the Tribe's only able to make roster moves by giving up young talent. Without the resources to play effectively in the free agent market, Shapiro really does have to do his job with one hand tied behind his back. That's too bad, because he deserves better. Come to think of it, so do we.

Check out this Cool Website

What if the 1965 NFL Championship was played in Cleveland, instead of Green Bay? What if the 1964 NFL Champion Browns played the AFL Champion Buffalo Bills? Could the Miracle at Richfield Cavs have beaten the Celtics if Jim Chones hadn't broken his foot?

To find the answers to these questions, or any other NFL, MLB, NBA or NHL "what ifs?" that have been bugging you, go to WhatIfSports.com and click on "Sim Matchup."