Oh Well, Whatever, Never Mind

Bode Miller, Olympic slacker all-star, supposedly has his best remaining shot at winning a medal in today's Giant Slalom. For those of you who missed it, Miller wiffed in the Super G on Saturday, and after one run, things ain't looking too good for our boy today either. The media is already crucifying him. Good. Bode appears to be well on his way to being the biggest Olympic bust since Duane Bobick.

I do, however, have good news for Bode: I think I found a nice lady for him. Her name is Lindsey Jacobellis. As you'll recall, she's the nitwit snowboarder who hot-dogged her way out of a Gold medal last week when she fell down after doing a trick right before the finish line of the final. Smart move, Lindsey!

What makes Lindsey perfect for Bode is how she reacted to her mishap. First, she tried to B.S. her way out of it by explaining that what we thought was a bit of hot-dogging was a tactical move. Uh-huh. Then, when she came clean, she told us that she was "fine" with her Silver medal: "I'm fine with it. It's just a race. I know it's the Olympics and everyone has been trying to get a reaction out of me by saying that, but no matter how many times they say it, it's not going to change how I feel."

Smells Like Teen Spirit, doesn't it? Kurt Cobain would be so proud of these two.

As Mrs. Rhino said to me when we heard Jacobellis' comments on the radio, "I guess these are the kind of Olympic athletes you get when you spend the last 25 years boosting everyone's self-esteem."

Update: Bode's now officially 0 for 4.